My thoughts on  being asked the question “how do you feel about what kind of parent you are”? Well I certainly don’t live up to the main stream expectation of a good parent in the USA.     It would seem too me that it would be best to ask this question of one’s children.   Hopefully my son and my grandchildren will know that I find them very interesting people and am very interested in their lives and activities.  If their expectation is that I would be there for every event, call them every day, and make them the center of my life, then I would be a failure.    It has always seemed to me to be a burden on children to have a child or children be the center of a parent’s existence.   How interesting a person can you be if you have no interest other than your children.    At times during the child’s early life that is a necessity, however, as they grow and mature allowing them to separate means you have to find your own passions.     If you have no passion other than family and children then that becomes a loaded dynamic for guilt.    After all if you have given up everything for your children, have nothing going for you but your children and their activities then it is to be expected that when they get ready to leave the nest they will feel guilt at leaving you.    Is that what you want for yourself and your children – guilt?   I don’t think so, at least not for this lady.     Leave the guilt at being an individual with your own separate interests and passions, move ahead with your own life, allow your children to spread their wings and know that you are a person with or without them.   

Peggy